Today is the last Tuesday and, thus, free morning before the end the the year. I probably should mail some gifts at the post office or run some other errands child free. But, I chose to clean. Not because my house is a disaster, or I have anyone but my family entering it in the near future. I just love a clean house. I even like the act of cleaning.
I don't think it is because I am crazy. It isn't because I have no interests. Rather, being a visual person, it makes me very happy when things are tidy and in order. Just as it bothers me to the core when my middle wears his skull cap on top of his hood, or when my husband calls navy "green" and pairs it with black, things need to flow for me visually. I spend a good part of my day at home and I like it to make sense and be in order.
To be more poetic and less odd, I also like what the act of caring for my house symbolizes for my family. I like giving the gift of order to them. I am happy to create an environment where things make sense, visually or otherwise. The world is unpredictable and refuses to be constrained by order. In my home, I like to take a break from that chaos. So, clean on I will.
How do you view house work? With dread or delight?
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Monday, December 12, 2011
Mondays are pretty great...or are they?
I am probably in the minority, but some weeks I really love Monday mornings. Sometimes, it’s hard saying goodbye to the weekend and getting back into work-activity-school-mode. Other times, I am just reminded how good I have it. While John was up and out on his 45 minute commute by 5AM, I find myself at home. Here I am In a quiet house, by the fire, lounging with my dogs. Not a bad way to start the week! Yes, things will explode into aliveness at any moment. Child wake-up to school drop off time is a challenge. But, 2/3 of my kids are dropped off for 6 hour each day! Leaving me with time to go to boxing class, run an errand or two, do some art with Liam, and (hopefully) enjoy a quiet house during his afternoon nap. I won’t get into the complexities of the after school hours. Why ruin a good story?
The weekend was pretty great too. All three children spent Saturday afternoon in the theater with their grandparents while John and I stayed home…alone! How often does that happen? Pretty much....never. Sunday, we skipped church and spent the day together. A lazy brunch, a trip to the gym for a workout , family basketball (you guessed it, I was a star), and swimming. Then home for some Christmas Crafting.
First, a rustic Christmas Wreath made with Liam. We used last years wreath frame (thank you, John for saving everything to a fault), and greens from our yard. Created with leland cypress, mock orange and something things that I don’t know the names of and tied together with twine. Tada! Free holiday wreath.
I love using the word "rustic" in place of "scrappy
Next, Amelia and I worked on creating woven headbands out of an old tee shirt. Another free craft - yipee! Amelia is working on ideas for Christmas gifts. So act suprised if you are on her list. She made hers herself. I made one too, but how can I post a picture of my baby hair next to Amelia's amazing lion mane? The boys decided they were basketball sweat band. As you can see, they also decided that they were hilarious.
Who wore it best?
Good food, family, a workout, and crafting. It may have been the perfect day. Thinking about the weekend, my Monday doesn't seem so wonderful as it did a few minutes ago. Time for some coffee to rearrange my view.....
What is your favorite way to spend a Sunday?
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Why I am saying goodbye to my adventures with Kindermusik
I have been thinking about writing this post for a few weeks now. In fact, I think a good reason to why there has been tumbleweed blowing around my blog is because I couldn't bring myself to do it. While I have made my official "this will be my last semester announcements" to my classes, my family, my friends and St. Luke's, putting it in writing seems a lot more committal. I suppose that is where the phrase "put it in writing" comes from. It isn't so easy to do. Over the past month, I have come to know well that the hardest decision are those that have you the most emotionally involved. For me, my Kindermusik studio has always been about a lot more then teaching music.
I love teaching music! I love each child that I have taught. It has been a joy watching them come alive in song and dance. It has been a priviledge watching the love in a parents eyes as they witness their child being moved to music, interacting with peers, or just doing something ridiculously adorable. I love watching the St. Lukes Pre-K class share ideas musically. Seeing friends dance and sing together is beautiful. I adore knowing that a parent and child can come into my class and experience moments of tenderness and quite as they rock and snuggle to music.
At this point you may be expecting the flip side, what I really hate about my teaching experience. While every moment has not been perfect. Most of my time in the classroom has felt pretty darn close. I even enjoy the preparation. Using my brain to communicate with parents and other grown-ups has been great. There really aren't a whole lot of skunks in the yard.
To say that I have decided to stop teaching so that I have more time to spend with my family sounds like a really good answer. Unfortunately, it would be a lie. I love my family. I also spend PLENTY of time with them. I don't need more time to "get things done" around the house. The truth is, I have been very efficient for the past five years. I have managed to teach in the morning, spend time with my children, exercise the dogs, make a fresh healthy meal, make it to the gym and be in bed by 10PM all with a clean house. There in lies my reason for closing my little Minuet Studio. I have no time for nothing. In reading this over, it sounds like a "it's hard being beautiful" kind of rant. That is not my intention. But rather, to make the point that striving to be a "super mom" can leave you feeling a little empty. Even when, with practice, you have become pretty good at it. There is a sacrifice.
When I speak of doing nothing, I don't mean "nothing" as in hanging around with my family with no where to be and nothing on my to-do list. My "nothing" is all about me. Be it selfish or not, I am ready to care for myself as a priority. When I find free moments by myself, I have found that I'm pretty tapped out physically and creatively. It has taken me 9 years of parenting to finally realize the depth into which I need my solitude. While I may not come across this way while teaching, I am an introvert to the core. I thoroughly love my time with students, friends and my family. But, I NEED time by myself, lots of it. If you are a parent or caregiver, you know how impossible this can be when you hold a loaded schedule.
For the past five years, my creativity has been devoted to my studio, and my children. I am ready to revisit the aspects of my creativity that have been often dormant. It doesn't mean that I will be creating masterpieces, or learning to play the trombone. Rather, I am leaving space to create in whatever capacity I am drawn to each day. Maybe in a meal for my husband, maybe in a short story, maybe in redecorating my laundry room. It may not sound as interesting as running a small music business, but to me, right now, it sounds very luxurious.
I recently spoke with Father Paul (of St. Luke's) about my plans to stop teaching. In addition to his kindness and loving support he made a comment something like this: "Many busy families find themselves spinning their wheels. If you are able to take the time to keep the hearth fires going strong, what a difference you can make in your lives". I have always seen this as important as it relates for my family. I now see how important is is for me to keep the hearth fires in my own heart burning, and daily.
What fires would you like to rekindle?
I love teaching music! I love each child that I have taught. It has been a joy watching them come alive in song and dance. It has been a priviledge watching the love in a parents eyes as they witness their child being moved to music, interacting with peers, or just doing something ridiculously adorable. I love watching the St. Lukes Pre-K class share ideas musically. Seeing friends dance and sing together is beautiful. I adore knowing that a parent and child can come into my class and experience moments of tenderness and quite as they rock and snuggle to music.
At this point you may be expecting the flip side, what I really hate about my teaching experience. While every moment has not been perfect. Most of my time in the classroom has felt pretty darn close. I even enjoy the preparation. Using my brain to communicate with parents and other grown-ups has been great. There really aren't a whole lot of skunks in the yard.
To say that I have decided to stop teaching so that I have more time to spend with my family sounds like a really good answer. Unfortunately, it would be a lie. I love my family. I also spend PLENTY of time with them. I don't need more time to "get things done" around the house. The truth is, I have been very efficient for the past five years. I have managed to teach in the morning, spend time with my children, exercise the dogs, make a fresh healthy meal, make it to the gym and be in bed by 10PM all with a clean house. There in lies my reason for closing my little Minuet Studio. I have no time for nothing. In reading this over, it sounds like a "it's hard being beautiful" kind of rant. That is not my intention. But rather, to make the point that striving to be a "super mom" can leave you feeling a little empty. Even when, with practice, you have become pretty good at it. There is a sacrifice.
When I speak of doing nothing, I don't mean "nothing" as in hanging around with my family with no where to be and nothing on my to-do list. My "nothing" is all about me. Be it selfish or not, I am ready to care for myself as a priority. When I find free moments by myself, I have found that I'm pretty tapped out physically and creatively. It has taken me 9 years of parenting to finally realize the depth into which I need my solitude. While I may not come across this way while teaching, I am an introvert to the core. I thoroughly love my time with students, friends and my family. But, I NEED time by myself, lots of it. If you are a parent or caregiver, you know how impossible this can be when you hold a loaded schedule.
For the past five years, my creativity has been devoted to my studio, and my children. I am ready to revisit the aspects of my creativity that have been often dormant. It doesn't mean that I will be creating masterpieces, or learning to play the trombone. Rather, I am leaving space to create in whatever capacity I am drawn to each day. Maybe in a meal for my husband, maybe in a short story, maybe in redecorating my laundry room. It may not sound as interesting as running a small music business, but to me, right now, it sounds very luxurious.
I recently spoke with Father Paul (of St. Luke's) about my plans to stop teaching. In addition to his kindness and loving support he made a comment something like this: "Many busy families find themselves spinning their wheels. If you are able to take the time to keep the hearth fires going strong, what a difference you can make in your lives". I have always seen this as important as it relates for my family. I now see how important is is for me to keep the hearth fires in my own heart burning, and daily.
What fires would you like to rekindle?
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