The story of Jack

I can hardly say “I can’t believe my Jack is 8 tomorrow”, he has been counting down the days for months now.  Anyone who knows him knows that his birthday is near, he has made sure of it.  I can say that for the last 8 years, this firecracker has hijacked my heart and taken it for an incredible adventure.

One of the favorite traditions that I have created with my children falls on their birthdays.  A few years ago, I started telling them the story of their birth on each   birthday morning.  Of my three, Jack has taken to this the most.  So, in honor of his birth, I will share it here today.

Jack:

You have always had ants in your pants.  Three months before you were supposed to be born, you decided that you just couldn’t wait.  You were ready to be born ahead of schedule.  So, you landed the both of in the hospital for one month.  We spent a lot of time alone together in that room.  It was there that I learned that you would not be an Abigail but a John Robert V, our “Jack”.   Then we waited, and waited….and waited.  Two and a half months later, the Doctors didn’t try to stop your escape.  So, you exploded into the world, heart setting fire to our lives.

I knew that you would be coming before I put Amelia in her crib to sleep on the eve of your birth.  I also knew that Daddy wouldn’t be there for your big arrival.  He was across the bay in Bangor waiting to board a submarine.  So, we stayed up and waited some more.  I devoured the pages of birthing books trying to prepare us.  Areeba kept us company, following us around with her big, concerned vizsla eyes.  She too knew you were coming soon.  When the sun started to rise in the early morning we headed to the hospital with Grandma.  Amelia, still asleep, stayed behind with Aunt Maura.  She had no idea that she was about to be a big sister.  It was June 20, the longest day of the year.

When we got to the hospital, you decided that you had waited long enough.  You were born in less then an hour.  Fast and wild, and a tornado of emotion – just like today.  The first part that I saw of you were your huge feet.  The nurse handed you to me feet first.  They were so enormous that they hung out and arched from the swaddling blanket.   I was sure they must be half as big as you were (and that something was wrong with them).  I was more sure of the love I had with you.  When I first saw your face you looked so strange.  You were sucking in your bottom lip so much that it looked as if you had a little beak for a nose.  I thought you were so strange looking.  But, I didn’t care.  I had just been handed my heart, swaddled and fierce.  Two months later everyone told me that you were ” too pretty to be a boy”.   Your feet, still big, now looked human.  Your eyes were wide and bright.  Your lower lip released.

Today, while I was unpacking Jack's school work, I found a flower that he had made.  On each petal he had written a quality that he loves in himself.  He had written:

Sense of Humor

Athlete

Scientist

Adventurer

Loves Animals

I don't think that flower can be limited to five petals, but I think he did a pretty good job in trying.

A Short Post on The Longest Pose

I am winding down a yoga practice in where I have been holding my longest pose ever. Almost two weeks ago I started feeling a tightness in my neck and shoulder.  Almost like a muscle pull, but not quite.  

Breathe flows in, breathe flows out this too shall pass.  

It did, but only because I slept through the pain.  The next morning brought stiffness, and intensity.  

Breath quickness, I stop and slow it down.  This too shall pass.  

But, it didn't.  Imagine being stuck in the extension of a shoulder press or in a clumsy Pincha Mayurasana...for ten days.  It starts off manageable, but quickly feels like torture.  There have been times where I have breathed through the pain or focused on a conversation and momentarily come out of the intensity.  There have been times when I have gotten angry or sad.  And, I have often felt sorry for myself.  In the loneliest, quietest hours of night I have been present to surrender and grace, but more often pain and anguish.  The longest pose, the longest practice - EVER.


On Thursday my x-ray confirmed that I have a bulging/slipped/herniated disc in my lower neck (C5/C6).  Boo.  To make things worse it showed that all of my discs look older then they should, so are at risk for more injury.  Double boo.  The pain is largely a result sandwiched nerves.  I am starting to see some relief, but still have limited use of my right arm and hand, and have bicep weakness.  My next practice will be recovery.    As typing is still pretty uncomfortable, I will close at that.  All the while breath still flows in and out.