I love house work, and I don't are if that makes boring.

Today is the last Tuesday and, thus, free morning before the end the the year.  I probably should mail some gifts at the post office or run some other errands child free.  But, I chose to clean.  Not because my house is a disaster, or I have anyone but my family entering it in the near future.  I just love a clean house.  I even like the act of cleaning.

I don't think it is because I am crazy.  It isn't because I have no interests.  Rather, being a visual person, it makes me very happy when things are tidy and in order.  Just as it bothers me to the core when my middle wears his skull cap on top of his hood, or when my husband calls navy "green" and pairs it with black, things need to flow for me visually.  I spend a good part of my day at home and I like it to make sense and be in order.

To be more poetic and less odd, I also like what the act of caring for my house symbolizes for my family.  I like giving the gift of order to them.  I am happy to create an environment where things make sense, visually or otherwise.  The world is unpredictable and refuses to be constrained by order.  In my home, I like to take a break from that chaos.  So, clean on I will.

How do you view house work?  With dread or delight?

Mondays are pretty great...or are they?

I am probably in the minority, but some weeks I really love Monday mornings.   Sometimes, it’s hard saying goodbye to the weekend and getting back into work-activity-school-mode.  Other times, I am just reminded how good I have it.  While John was up and out on his 45 minute commute by 5AM, I find myself at home.  Here I am In a quiet house, by the fire,  lounging with my dogs.  Not a bad way to start the week! Yes, things will explode into aliveness at any moment.  Child wake-up to school drop off time is a challenge.  But, 2/3 of my kids are dropped off for 6 hour each day!  Leaving me with time to go to boxing class,  run an errand or two, do some art with Liam, and (hopefully) enjoy a quiet house during his afternoon nap.  I won’t get into the complexities of the after school hours.  Why ruin a good story?

The weekend was pretty great too.  All three children spent Saturday afternoon in the theater with their grandparents while John and I stayed home…alone!  How often does that happen?  Pretty much....never.  Sunday, we skipped church and spent the day together.  A lazy brunch, a trip to the gym for a workout , family basketball (you guessed it, I was a star), and swimming.  Then home for some Christmas Crafting.

First, a rustic Christmas Wreath made with Liam.  We used last years wreath frame (thank you, John for saving everything to a fault), and greens from our yard.  Created with leland cypress, mock orange and something things that I don’t know the names of and tied together with twine.  Tada!  Free holiday wreath.

I love using the word "rustic" in place of "scrappy

Next, Amelia and I worked on creating woven headbands out of an old tee shirt.  Another free craft - yipee!  Amelia is working on ideas for Christmas gifts.  So act suprised if you are on her list.  She made hers herself.  I made one too, but how can I post a picture of my baby hair next to Amelia's amazing lion mane?  The boys decided they were basketball sweat band.  As you can see, they also decided that they were hilarious.

Who wore it best?

Good food, family, a workout, and crafting.  It may have been the perfect day.  Thinking about the weekend, my Monday doesn't seem so wonderful as it did a few minutes ago.  Time for some coffee to rearrange my view.....

What is your favorite way to spend a Sunday?

Why I am saying goodbye to my adventures with Kindermusik

I have been thinking about writing this post for a few weeks now.  In fact, I think a good reason to why there has been tumbleweed blowing around my blog is because I couldn't bring myself to do it.  While I have made my official "this will be my last semester announcements" to my classes, my family, my friends and St. Luke's, putting it in writing seems a lot more committal.  I suppose that is where the phrase "put it in writing" comes from.  It isn't so easy to do.  Over the past month, I have come to know well that the hardest decision are those that have you the most emotionally involved.  For me, my Kindermusik studio has always been about a lot more then teaching music.


I love teaching music!  I love each child that I have taught.  It has been a joy watching them come alive in song and dance.  It has been a priviledge watching the love in a parents eyes as they witness their child being moved to music, interacting with peers, or just doing something ridiculously adorable.  I love watching the St. Lukes Pre-K class share ideas musically.  Seeing friends dance and sing together is beautiful.  I adore knowing that a parent and child can come into my class and experience moments of tenderness and quite as they rock and snuggle to music.  


At this point you may be expecting the flip side, what I really hate about my teaching experience.  While every moment has not been perfect.  Most of my time in the classroom has felt pretty darn close.  I even enjoy the preparation.  Using my brain to communicate with parents and other grown-ups has been great.  There really aren't a whole lot of skunks in the yard.


To say that I have decided to stop teaching so that I have more time to spend with my family sounds like a really good answer.  Unfortunately, it would be a lie.  I love my family.  I also spend PLENTY of time with them.  I don't need more time to "get things done" around the house.  The truth is, I have been very efficient for the past five years.  I have managed to teach in the morning, spend time with my children, exercise the dogs, make a fresh healthy meal, make it to the gym and be in bed by 10PM all with a clean house.  There in lies my reason for closing my little Minuet Studio.  I have no time for nothing.  In reading this over, it sounds like a "it's hard being beautiful" kind of rant.  That is not my intention.  But rather, to make the point that striving to be a "super mom" can leave you feeling a little empty.  Even when, with practice, you have become pretty good at it.  There is a sacrifice.


When I speak of doing nothing, I don't mean "nothing" as in hanging around with my family with no where to be and nothing on my to-do list.  My "nothing" is all about me.  Be it selfish or not, I am ready to care for myself as a priority.  When I find free moments by myself, I have found that I'm pretty tapped out physically and creatively.  It has taken me 9 years of parenting to finally realize the depth into which I need my solitude.  While I may not come across this way while teaching, I am an introvert to the core.  I thoroughly love my time with students, friends and my family.  But, I NEED time by myself, lots of it.  If you are a parent or caregiver, you know how impossible this can be when you hold a loaded schedule.


For the past five years, my creativity has been devoted to my studio, and my children.  I am ready to revisit the aspects of my creativity that have been often dormant.  It doesn't mean that I will be creating masterpieces, or learning to play the trombone.  Rather, I am leaving space to create in whatever capacity I am drawn to each day.  Maybe in a meal for my husband, maybe in a short story, maybe in redecorating my laundry room.  It may not sound as interesting as running a small music business, but to me, right now, it sounds very luxurious.   


I recently spoke with Father Paul (of St. Luke's) about my plans to stop teaching.  In addition to his kindness and loving support he made a comment something like this:  "Many busy families find themselves spinning their wheels.  If you are able to take the time to keep the hearth fires going strong, what a difference you can make in your lives".    I have always seen this as important as it relates for my family.  I now see how important is is for me to keep the hearth fires in my own heart burning, and daily.

What fires would you like to rekindle?  

Meet Cheesy McQueen

Welcome Thanksgiving break!!!!! How I love having my big kids home during the day!  No waking up early to make lunches and tie up loose ends, no uniforms, and a little extra time in the morning to hang out and play.  This morning, Liam and Jack helped to make banana pancakes and we went to work building a play mobile castle.  Dixie Belle Boyds went to work eating any toys she could sneak before being caught.  Amelia worked on sleeping in (lucky thing).

Then, we were off to the gym.  Kids to kids club and I to a crazy hard step and weights class.   I followed that with a shower in peace.  Funny how a shower at the gym is more private then a shower at home.  No one even opened the shower curtain to comment on my various body parts!  Next, off to Michael's for Chirstmas card supplies and home for lunch.  With a little extra time, we had a water drinking competition (I won, yes, I've still got it) and the kids constructed their own sandwiches:  butterless grilled cheese in the sandwich maker.  Liam was given the choice:  light cheese, medium, lots of cheese or...Cheesy McQueen.  Of course, he went with the McQueen.  Here is his creation.

                                                  
                                           Don't you See the Resemblance?

I think the onions are supposed to be the front and back windows.  I'm not too sure how the carrots fit in.  We couldn't put the bread together (of course, that would ruin it), so it was baked in the oven.  The problem: Liam couldn't bring himself to eat, and thus kill, McQueen.  So, we settled on him taking a few portraits so that he could live on forever.  He never did eat the carrots.

Long Live Cheesy McQueen!

Single Parenting Take 4

If Joey had red hair, this trio would be a perfect Match to my three.

Why is it that when my children are sick they still have abundant energy?  No lethargic, cuddlers taking long naps.  Nope, mine get really crabby (in fact mean) and are still bouncing off of the walls.  Why do I bring this up?  You guessed it, I have a sick child.  


My first clue that something was wrong happened this morning.  Just as finished step class, the kids club attendant came to get me. Since Liam is not in diapers and never gets lonely for me there, I knew that he was either a) sick or b) naughty.  To my delight, the answer was c) both a and b.  Apparently, my Liam had a massive and violent temper tantrum that included him kicking the attendant and calling her "stupid" (I'm so proud).  When I came to collect him, he was hiding in shame.  He also had a slight fever.  The very kind caregivers were understanding as he has never done anything like this before. I made sure to blame big brother and sister for the introduction of the word "stupid" to his vocabulary (when they say it I blame the Junie B Jones books they read in Kindergarten). I had to carry him out screaming, flailing, and kicking.  If I would have known that this was how my gym experience would end, I would have chosen lighter weights during class.


So, a slightly runny nose and a slightly feverish boy meant a complete rearrangement of my schedule.  No preschool for Liam tomorrow.  Which leads to no childcare, which leads t no Pre-K Kindermusik class for St. Luke's tomorrow.  No husband to hand off to so...no family outing for Amelia's end of the season soccer party.  Many thanks to the lovely and understanding Mrs. M for bringing her and, hopefully, bringing her back.  They are still out partying.

Single Parenting, Take 3

I'm not sure what is different about this time.  But, after being gone for 3 days, Liam no longer calls his father "Daddy".  He is now referred to as "John".

To be honest, it was much harder to have to go it alone when my kids younger.  Now, our lives are so busy that I don't seem to notice that I am on my own until the day comes to a close.  The biggest frustration to me is that I can't go anywhere alone.  I usually hold my grocery shopping,  dog hikes, and errand running until John comes home from work.  Or, save it for the weekend.  Now,  every trip is a lively adventure.  The one thing that I can't bring the kids to that pains me most is yoga.


The bright side of this change in routine is that I had to fit a yoga class into the only window that was available to me.  Today, during my one free morning while Liam is in preschool, I tried a class that I had never gone to before.  Labeled as a basic flow class, my ego didn't even think to consider going.  I am so glad that I did!  I knew that the instructor was amazingly gifted, so I'm not sure why I was surprised that I got so much out of it.  In a nut shell, it was a reminder that everything needs to be built on a good foundation in order to bring fulfillment yoga and life alike.  I left feel more grounded and inspired then I have felt in a long time.  

Single Parenting Take 2

The happy times of yesterday continued into the day.  In this chilly weather, I spent as much time as possible next to the fire with a book and someone to snuggle.  I feel a little guilty that while we are toasty and warm in our cozy home, John is freezing cold and sleeping elbow to elbow with loudly snoring sailors.  But, he probably hasn’t been pelted by “I hate you” for the better part of the afternoon.

In preparation for the battle of wills with my three year old, I spent the morning in heavy bag boxing.  If I haven’t said it enough before, I LOVE BOXING.  Maybe, it’s the little person complex in me trying to feel badass.  Maybe, it is the pent up energy from all of the times I have had to bite my tongue with my fiery three year old.  Maybe, it is just a super fun, sweaty workout.  Whatever it is, it left me ready to conquer the world.  Or, if not the world, sneaker shopping and another trip to China Lake with Liam and the dogs.  My advice to all mothers of young children:  You must try boxing!!!!!  It is an amazing stress relief. 

The heavens smiled down on me and moved Jack’s soccer coach to cancel practice at the last minute.  An afternoon with nothing planned!  No carpool, no errands, no meetings, nothing.  So, back to the fire it was for homework and warm milk.  The kids were thrilled that I had baked English Muffins and served them breakfast for dinner.  I was happy to slack on meals with no other adult to cook for.  That is one of my favorite parts of single parenting, lazy meals and no complaints.  It almost makes me want to convert to boring meals all together.  But , not quite.

Well, I just got a hair stroke and a gentle “ I love you, you’re a good mom” from my angry dictator…..

Day 2 gets 4 stars!

What is your favorite stress relief?